Just wake up

Ever get the feeling you just need to wake up. You know your not asleep but still it donít seem like it is you doing things. Itís like your watching someone else living your life. Like a comma victim dreaming for 2 plus years. What is going on? Youíre not sure who you actually are. Are you this self destructive person who claws and breaks your own skin, are you this person who panics when something small and unimportant goes wrong. You just need to wake up. See whatís really out there. Why do we hide? Why do we close the gates let nobody in. ask yourself is this me? Is this how I want my life to be? Is it work? Or family? Or other people who cage you in? No its you who cages yourself in. its you who over criticizes, its you who hates everything you create. Its you who wonít set you free. You are your worst and only real enemy. Wake up fix what is wrong change what need to be changed, forgive, forget stop hiding, and be the you you want to be. Fuck everybody else. You make the trials you set the bar high, you send the demons and monsters you break yourself in ways no one could. Only you can send the angels to defeat the monsters. Only you can rise up from the fires you light. No one else can harm you as bad you can.

Itís a battle a war in your own mind and its you thatís winning and loosing. Its not like a world war there are no other nations coming to help you, its your battle its your war fight until there is no fight left, till you are at the point of loosing completely then when you get back up face whatever shite is out there thatís when you win.

These are the ramblings of someone who knows what it is like to not want to get out of bed. To refuse to look in the mirror. To give up on things they love for no reason. To have waited for someone else to save them. To listen to the wrong voices both in real life and in there head. To let failure overcome success. To concentrate on things gone wrong and ignore things gone right. Are you this person who punishes themselves? Instead of wanting to get better they just get worse. It is a choice they made but they can change there mind, they can change what they need to change. We live, we die its what we do in the middle that counts.